How to make meetings work: A collection of best advice of all time

On October 25, 2016 By thesuccessmanual Topic: Remarkable, Book summary, Mba

This guide belongs to 100 Ways To Be Being Remarkable Series, a special project that brings you business and self-development advice from The Success Manual.

THERE ARE ONLY THREE KINDS OF CLASSIC MEETINGS
1. Information.
2. Discussion.
3. Permission.

THERE ARE TWO KINDS OF QUESTIONS
1. Questions designed to honestly elicit more information.
2. Questions designed to demonstrate how much you know or your position on an issue and to put the answerer on the defensive.
Be careful not to combine them.
- Seth Godin

The schoolmaster, since time immemorial has believed that the ass is an organ of learning. The longer you sit, the more you know.
–Peter Drucker

Listen, if you really want to save time and productivity, ban meetings. Now, you are on to something.
- David Pogue

People can be themselves only in small comprehensible groups.
– E.F. Schumaker

Don't try to mange from any board of directors-or any other kind of meeting.
-Robert Heller

Always start a meeting with one member of the group telling his or her most embarrassing personal experience relating to the subject matter. This tends to lighten up the group and provide for a free flow of information.
- Kurt Wilson

There is an inverse correlation between how much someone talks about how busy they are and how busy they actually are.
- Ben Casnocha

Add start time and time zone in the title of a calendar entry (e.g. "Phone call with Howard at 9:30 AM PST") to prevent timing confusion when you're traveling and computer time zone changes.
- John Kembel

Here’s my theory about meetings and life; the three things you can’t fake are erections, competence and creativity. That’s why meetings become toxic they put uncreative people in a situation in which they have to be something they can never be. And the more effort they put into concealing their inabilities, the more toxic the meeting becomes. One of the most common creativity-faking tactics is when someone puts their hands in prayer position and conceals their mouth while they nod at you and say, 'Mmmmmm. Interesting.' If pressed, they’ll add, 'I’ll have to get back to you on that.' Then they don’t say anything else.
- Douglas Coupland

MEETINGS: FIRST THINGS FIRST
- Have an Agenda
- Have a Time Limit
- Track Meeting Best Practices – Like, Meeting tax at Intel/Microsoft e-mail
- Keep detailed records of the meeting (the minutes)
- Make a note of people who hinder meetings.
- Turn these people (who think they have nothing valuable to offer) to your advantage by directing skills, asking them to follow up on details, prepare a report & so on.
- For both the obstructers and the bores, write key decisions already made/key areas already covered during a meeting on a flipchart. This keeps them from returning to old territory, as others will say the matter is already dealt with.
- Make it clear to the comic that while you really welcome humor it is wearing for everyone if it happens too often. you should welcome the aspiring leader’s intervention but state clearly where you stand on the issue.
- Bullies think people will not challenge them and if you do so, you will usually gain support from the rest of the meeting.
Moreover, ask each person to comment on an issue and don’t let the observer off the hook. Ask, “Where exactly do you stand? Or “I’d every much like to know how personally feel about the issue?”
- Have a system of rewards and payments – incentives for on time people, for people who contribute constructively.
- Be persuasive in meetings: Use the right tone; say “I” more often;

He/She who writes the Agenda and Summary Doc (innocently called “Meeting Notes wields…Incredible Power!
- Tom Peters

GETTING SERIOUS ABOUT YOUR MEETING PROBLEM
1. The organizer of the meeting is required to send a short email summary, with action items, to every attendee within ten minutes of the end of the meeting.
2. Create a public space (either a big piece of poster board or a simple online page) that allows attendees to rate meetings and their organizers on a scale of 1 to 5 in terms of usefulness. Just a simple box where everyone can write a number. Watch what happens.
3. If you're not adding value to a meeting, leave. You can always read the summary later.
- Seth Godin

GUY’S RULES
1. How to survive a meeting that’s poorly run.
First, assume that most of what you’ll hear is pure, petty, ass-covering bull shiitake, and it’s part of the game. This will prevent you from going crazy. Second, focus on what you want to accomplish in the meeting and ignore everything else. Once you get what you want, take yourself “out of your body,” sit back, and enjoy the show. Third, vow to yourself that someday you’ll start a company, and your meetings won’t work like this.

2. How to run a meeting.
You need to understand that the primary purpose of a business meeting is to make a decision. It is not to share experiences or feel warm and fuzzy. With that in mind, here are five key points to learn about running a meeting:
(1) Start on time even if everyone isn’t there because they will be next time;
(2) Invite the fewest people possible to the meeting;
(3) Set an agenda for exactly what’s going to happen at the meeting;
(4) End on time so that everyone focuses on the pertinent issues;
(5) Send an email to all participants that confirms decisions reviews action items. There are more power tips for running good meetings, but if you do these five, you’re ahead of 90% of the world.
- Guy Kawasaki

HOW TO RUN A MEETING LIKE GOOGLE
No one wastes time searching for a purpose at Marissa Mayer's meetings—even five-minute gatherings must have a clear agenda

1. Set a firm agenda. that outlines what the participants want to discuss and the best way of using the allotted time.

2. Assign a note-taker. On one wall, a projector displays the presentation, while right next to it, another projector shows the transcription of the meeting.

3. Carve out micro-meetings. sets aside large blocks of time that she slices into smaller, self-contained gatherings on a particular subject or project.

4. Hold office hours. Beginning at 4 p.m., for 90 minutes a day, Mayer holds office hours.

Employees add their name to a board outside her office, and she sees them on a first-come, first-serve basis.

5. Discourage politics, use data. Google chooses designs on a clearly defined set of metrics and how well they perform against those metrics. Designs are chosen based on merit and evidence, not personal relationships. Mayer discourages using the phrase "I like" in design meetings, such as "I like the way the screen looks." Instead, she encourages such comments as "The experimentation on the site shows that his design performed 10% better." This works for Google, because it builds a culture driven by customer feedback data, not the internal politics that pervade so many of today's corporations.

6. Stick to the clock. To add a little pressure to keep meetings focused, Google gatherings often feature a giant timer on the wall, counting down the minutes left for a particular meeting or topic. It's literally a downloadable timer that runs off a computer and is projected 4 feet tall.

Source: Adapted from a Businessweek article.


TEN TIPS FOR EFFECTIVE MEETINGS
1) Avoid meetings
2) Prepare goals.
3) Challenge each goal. Ask, "Is there another way to achieve this?"
4) Prepare an agenda.
5) Inform others. Send the agenda before the meeting
6) Assume control.
7) Focus on the issue.
8) Be selective.
9) Budget time.
10) Use structured activities in your meetings.
- stevekaye.com

MEETINGS MAKE US DUMBER: STUDY
Brainstorming sessions backfire when group thinking clouds decisions

People have a harder time coming up with alternative solutions to a problem when they are part of a group, new research suggests.

Scientists exposed study participants to one brand of soft drink then asked them to think of alternative brands. Alone, they came up with significantly more products than when they were grouped with two others.

People store and retrieve information in myriad ways, so in a group situation, the conversation could cause individuals to think about the cues differently than they would if they were alone.

Researchers said individuals, whether students, executives or football fans, should take time to consider the facts on their own before coming to a consensus.
- Source: LiveScience.com

6 KINDS OF PEOPLE WHO HINDER THE PRODUCTIVENESS OF MEETINGS

The Obstructor

Constantly asks questions; challenges the veracity of information or demands more facts; “Yes, but.....” is his favorite technique.

What to do: Turn these people (who think they have nothing valuable to offer) to your advantage by directing skills, asking them to follow up on details, prepare a report & so on.

The Bore
Talks a lot; repeats himself and wastes everyone’s time. Deal with them by limiting their time slot. Ask directly & pointedly, “How does this get us forward?” or “What solution are you proposing?”

What to do: For both the obstructors and the bores, write key decisions already made/key areas already covered during a meeting on a flipchart. This keeps them from returning to old territory, as others will say the matter is already dealt with.

Comics
They make jokes all the time, often at other people’s expense. After a point, the humor starts damaging the meeting. Comics often use jokes as a shield thinking they won’t be attacked (on their weaknesses/shortcomings).

What to do: Make it clear to the comic that while you really welcome humor it is wearing for everyone if it happens too often.

The Aspiring leader
Always tries to do your job of chairing the meeting without your agreement –summing up and trying to close down discussion prematurely.

What to do: Though one wants people to take responsibility and act assertively, you should welcome the aspiring leader’s intervention but state clearly where you stand on the issue.

The Bully
He makes others feel uncomfortable or humiliated. He is a poor listener and bulldozes his way in meetings. He is insensitive to feelings and is usually task-centered. The bully constantly interrupts people and hustles everyone to agree when they do not.

What to do: Bullies think people will not challenge them and if you do so, you will usually gain support from the rest of the meeting.

The Observer
He never really participates; he stays on the edge of the meeting the whole time. He will often take extensive notes so that he appears too busy to make a contribution. You may find his silence a bit oppressive at times. When he speaks he often refuses to commit themselves or says what he really thinks about the issue.

What to do: You should ask them to leave their extensive note-taking till later, saying that you will provide minutes of the meeting anyway. You should even ask what the notes are about. Moreover, ask each person to comment on an issue and don’t let the observer off the hook. Ask, “Where exactly do you stand? Or “I’d every much like to know how personally feel about the issue?”

REWARDS & PUNISHMENTS
- Punish latecomers by not supplying the full summary of the discussion.
- Allow a strict margin of 5 minutes over the starting time and no more. Ask people to come 10 minutes early and give them a little fun with mental exercises – like, a problem to solve.
- Reward those who have studied the paper in advance/have come fully prepared by thanking them and asking them to speak first.
- To someone who says he hasn’t read the papers/has not prepared, ask him to listen to the discussion. If many people say they have not read the relevant papers/prepared, suggest either that the item be delayed until another time or that the meeting spends a few minutes reading them.

CONFLICTS IN MEETINGS
If the discussion draws on and on; if there in lack of participation – and there are many late arrivals and there is excessive conflict inter-spread with bad interpersonal relations; and you feel things are not okay, ask yourself,

- What is the speaker feeling?
- What are the other people in the meeting feeling?
- What does the speaker mean as opposed to what they are saying?
- What is the objective and what hinders in its attainment?


And, if two parties are at conflict, ask each party to summarize the other’s case to the latter’s satisfaction.

HOW TO BE PERSUASIVE AT MEETINGS
1. Don’t ask for permission to talk or offer opinions.
Problem phrases- “ I Just wanted to say..”, “ I may be wrong but....”, “This may be off the subject, but...”

2. Send “ I” messages instead of “You” messages when you are signalling a problem.

Reason: “I” messages place responsibility for the discontent where it belongs with you. When you use these messages, you allow your audience to be generous and help you out of your predicament. “ You” messages, on the other hand, can cause your audience to become defensive about problem.

3. Give your comments a positive label.

If you want to make a point, say, “ I would like to make a point.” Then, make it. Do the opposite when you disagree. Saying, for example, “ I would like to disagree” presents you as a negative influence too early. Simply start with your reasons.

4. Add “ In my opinion” to soften a contrary statement and to relax people who might disagree.

5. Increase your chances to get what you want by using quick decision messages.


For example, “ Do you want to spend another meeting on this?” and so on.

6. Select the right tone.
Use first person for credibility: “ Today, we are going to solve the problem”.

Use the second person for familiarity: “You have the potential to solve this problem.”

Use third person for objectivity: “The issues are so serious, they demand....”
- Andrew Leigh, 20 ways to Manage Better

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